Crochet Projects

I figured even though I use Pinterest to keep up with all the crochet projects I think are awesome, or would love to do, I know I will never do everything in that board. Honestly there are like, 73 pins and I’m always adding to it. So since I have all this time on my hands waiting for Mads to get here next month, I will make a list of 5 projects that I’d like to do before she gets here! I like setting small goals for myself!

crochet baby turban... i just love how sweet this baby looks.

I’m absolutely, 100% in love with this and that freaking baby is so DARN CUTE. My heart melts every time I see her sweet little smile. :’) I’m dying to make Maddie one of these, I’m just having a hard time picking the color/s I wanna use. Picture credit


What a cute idea for a coin purse or a little travel craft bag, huh? I would like to even try making a plush to sit in Maddie’s room/crib! πŸ™‚Pinterest credits this photo to

Ravelry: Owl mug cozy pattern.

I’ve recently gotten into making mug cozies and would like to start selling them on Etsy. That’s another goal I have! To actually stock up my Etsy really well and sell lots of things! πŸ™‚ This little owl is just so darling.Β Photo creditΒ

love everything about this

I just want to make one of these squares. I’m too impatient for granny squares or working in the round (I really burned myself out on it a while back :(), but this is absolutely the most gorgeous granny square I have ever seen! I want these exact colors! I think I would end up loving it so much I would have to make some sort of bigger project out of it, even though I hate g-squares along with switching colors. haha I’m lazy >_> Picture credit

Knots and Thoughts: Crochet turban headband - FREE PATTERN

I am in LOVE with this turban headband. I think it’s absolutely gorgeous! The only thing i hate about it is that each row would literally be around 120 stitches long and that would drive me nuts. Jeez, I need to loosen up a bit about crochet projects. I will never grow if I don’t! But any way, I ended up getting too excited and made my own sort of turban ear warmer/headband last night when I couldn’t sleep. I finished it in about an hour.. I think I may end up putting it on my Etsy actually. I’m not a big ear warmer fan and I didn’t make the one I actually wanted to make to avoid the long ass chain/rows haha. I’m gonna suck it up though and make this exact one.. it’s too pretty to pass up! Picture credit

So guys, wish my luck! Perhaps I will be less lazy and take some photos as I finish these, as well as some projects I’ve already finished. πŸ™‚




My DIY Rules To Live By & Totally Useless DIY Gift Ideas

I’m very frugal, very crafty, and love to make something myself instead of spending money on it if I can. I also love to make things for people. As I’ve been a hardcore DIYer/crafter for a good 5 or 6 years (or you know, since birth, since I basically came out of the womb with art supplies in my hands) I’ve learned the dos and don’ts of DIY gifting, and mos DIY in general.

Before I get into the Totally Useless Gifts, I’m gonna lay down a few rules I set for myself when it comes to handmade gifting, that I think a lot of overly eager people could benefit from.

  1. Be patient. Don’t get in a big hurry! Take your time, make sure it’s QUALITY work. When I was helping my Papaw build my house, he would always say, “Now don’t get in such a big hurry.. Take your time and do it right. You wear yourself out doing it real quick and it doesn’t look as good.” I apply this to everything, because there it is so true! It is especially true with tedious projects or gifts. You don’t want to hand something over to someone looking like you didn’t put any effort into it because well, you didn’t.
  2. Don’t half-ass it. Ever. If you’re making something for the first time and the deadline (aka the holiday, birthday, baby/wedding shower, etc) is within a couple of days, get the heck on it. If it turns out a little wonky, you have time to either buy more supplies, take it apart/edit it or make another one in better shape. And if it turns out terribly, you have time to make an entirely new one, which leads me to…
  3. Have a backup plan. I don’t always go by this one because I try to stick with rules 1 and 2 (I feel like Gibbs.. rules to live by.. NCIS fans? Anyone?) and because.. I can kind of procrastinate or either can’t decide on what to make/what I like better. But it’s very handy to have a back up plan, not only in the crafting world, for obvious reasons.
  4. If you have the gut feeling it will sit around collecting dust, don’t make it. I’ve made my fair share of gifts that I thought were totally awesome that my friends/family kind of didn’t want. It’s funny now because they probably don’t even remember them whatsoever but I remember feeling really dumb and being able to notice the “oh, you got me this?” expression. Just because you think it’s really cool, it doesn’t mean everyone is gonna think it’s cool. If it’s just some neat little guy like a crocheted monogram key chain or a tiny plush of their favorite character/animal/whatever, then that’s alright of course, but don’t let that be your only gift.
  5. Don’t be so eager to point out the flaws! You know, you get nervous about whether or not they’ll like it so you feel you should admit that you know some things are wrong with it and then you point them out, and then they check those places on it out and realize they probably would not have even noticed it at all, unless they’re ridiculously observant. If you feel a little self-conscious about a certain part of it, just be really casual about it and laugh it off a little bit, saying something like, “it might be a little wonky in a couple of places!” that way you aren’t pointing them out, but you still want to seem modest about it.

So there you have it. Those are the 5 most important things I keep in mind when gifting something I’ve made myself. πŸ™‚ Now, onto the Totally Useless Gifts!

Before anyone gets offended… I’m sorry if you see this and discover I’ve used a photo that you took of one of your own projects. This is purely a list of opinion and I’m sure some people would really like these gifts.

A couple of these I have not personally made for anyone, I just think they seem a little ridiculous to give to someone, but a lot of these I’ve made myself and have discovered I completely wasted my time! Here we go.

Printable Love Coupon Book #freeprintable on ...such a great idea for Valentines!

Coupon books.Β Most coupon books have something to do with lovable gestures or sexy time. The coupons themselves are freaking adorable and it’s a shame that they would probably get thrown in a drawer and forgotten about! That’s what has happened for me. I made a cute coupon book once, with sweet things like breakfast in bed, epic back rub, dinner of your choice, free car wash, etc. I quickly realized these were things I did on the regular, and therefore this was not a special gift whatsoever. Therefore, it got stuck in a drawer and was forgotten about.

Certain coupon books, however, can be really adorable and fun! Like this V-Day coupon book for kids from mom or this Daddy Time coupon book. Both of these are totally thoughtful and endearing, even!

PaperVine: 52 Reasons I Love You Cards Tutorial You've heard about the '52 reasons I love you book' (completed on a deck of cards) ... This one is done with the alphabet so it's only Β½ has many, but they're alphabetized - Gotta do this for Valentine's Day Reasons "I love you" can

Any kind of display/list of reasons you love someone. Also tried this one. It takes a lot of time and effort to make something this sweet, thoughtful and emotional, only to watch your partner awkwardly read the reasons in front of you (which if you’ve listed 52 reasons on a deck of cards you will now never play with, would take forever) and after the 8th reason or so, the aww‘s and this is so sweet!‘s will become redundant. SO unless the guy/girl you’re dating is sensitive and emotional enough to appreciate this for longer than the time it takes to read (I would die if Brian made me something like this, revisiting it frequently, crying every single time – pregnant or not!), I wouldn’t suggest making such a big effort! Instead, fill the entire inside of a card with sweet things! No one throws away cards and when you rediscover a card from a couple of years ago, it’s always fun and interesting to read through. πŸ™‚Β Picture 1 credited on image | Picture 2 credit | Picture 3 credit

November 2012 043

Coasters. I thought about giving pretty scrapbook Mod Podge coasters as a gift once after I made some pretty ones of my own, and then I realized if someone gave me that as a gift I’d feel like they really couldn’t think of anything else to give me and had no idea what kind of person I was/what my interests were. So unless your coasters are super personalized and have meaning, I wouldn’t bother!
Picture credit


Homemade soap. Unless this is only PART of your gift and you know the person’s favorite scents and know they don’t have sensitive skin (like me!), I can promise you. If you give someone homemade soap for Christmas, a birthday, basically any holiday or any celebration, unless they specifically asked for it, no matter how cute you wrapped it…. no one wants a gift box full of soap you made for Christmas. Sorry. 😦 I do however love the idea of making my own soap since it seems like a rewarding project, and also because I do have sensitive skin and I’d know exactly what is going into it!Picture credit Martha Stewart

So there are some useless diy gifts for you to think about. Hopefully I wasn’t too harsh about it but I opened a few minds about which gift would be worth making! If you really want to make one of those things and think no one would like/appreciate it, make it for yourself. πŸ™‚ It’s much more enjoyable and could be slightly less painful or embarrassing!

Anyone want to suggest some bad handmade gift ideas? Experiences? Feel free!


Fabric Scrap Projects That Aren’t Completely Useless

This is mainly for my own benefit (I’m not making a Pinterest board just for this because I already have so many, and I hardly ever blog enough) but I’m sure lots of other people out there hoard their scrap fabric and have decided to finally do something with it, yet don’t really care for emery board cozies,Β fabric covered band-aids, or fabric leaves to lay around. Amirite? Thank you.

So here is an actual list of actually useful/appreciated/fun/cute projects to do with your scrap fabric. (Also all pic credit goes to wherever the link takes you, I hate when people make project lists and don’t share a photo preview!)

Reversible coffee cup sleeve #tutorial #craftDIY Coffee Cozy

1. Coffee cup cozies. I’m not a big coffee drinker, I prefer my under-200 mg of caffeine a day to be from two Coca Colas, but these are really cute, really easy, and really sell-able. And they don’t require much fabric. Plus if you don’t have any fancy elastic lying around (I hate elastic) you could resort to a hair bow, OR you could just go with velcro. Velcro is always better.
Example 1, example 2

2. Super quick & easy owl coin purseThis is made from a pattern that costs $5 from Michelle’s Patterns but tonight I made my own little owl coin purse with a pattern I made from scratch! My second project in over a year, and I made my OWN pattern from scratch, and it ACTUALLY turned out!!! I’m not really advertising it much as I don’t want to take away business from Michelle. I’ll just cuddle my cute little owl all on my own. :’)


3. Tiny flat mini wallets, perfect for making a quick trip to town without your purse and just your ID and the money/card you need! I love things like this. So cute and so simple and definitely very handy. Also if you mess it up, it doesn’t really matter since you didn’t use much fabric in the first place. πŸ™‚ Pic credit: This is not going to take you to a tutorial, but I’m sure if you search on Pinterest/Google you will find a ton. I’m a super beginner at sewing and I think I could make one of these without a pattern. πŸ™‚

4. A camera strap. A lot of us crafters/DIYers take photos of our projects, and if you have a DSLR, this could turn out really lovely.

5. A bb bib! If you’re a soon to be mommy like me, or just a crafty mom in general, you are dying to make everything related to babies, and these are really nice and modern and you can make them in patterns you actually like that aren’t super babyish or pastel! Yay! It’s a win all around.


That’s all I got right now. If you wanna share some with me, please comment and let me know! Keep in mind, I did not include the obvious (and boring) things like headbands, flowers, or appliques. So unless you find one of those that are just to die for – tutorial or purely inspiration – don’t feel obligated to share. πŸ˜‰

Oh, I do have one more.

6. A quilt

Because I firmly believe everyone who sews needs to experience making a quilt at some point. I currently am putting this off because I can be super anal about detail/placement on things, but when I decide to take the plunge and challenge myself, I will surely post it. πŸ™‚



10 MORE Things People Forgot To Mention About PREGNANCY

Remember this post? Yup. I have more. 😐 Pregnancy has no mercy!!!

10 MORE Things People Forgot To Mention About PREGNANCY

1. Round ligament pain. Probably the biggest nuisance during pregnancy. For about a month, every time I would cough, sneeze (which I have done a LOT of the entire pregnancy), stretch, or twist, I honestly felt like I was being stabbed! Round ligament pain is when the muscles around your uterus are growing and stretching and are just ultra sensitive to any movements you make. Super annoying!

2. You might break out in a rash – and there’s probably nothing you can do about it except wait it out. Yes, this is normal. Who would have thought pregnancy and all these crazy, extra hormones would make you break out in some random rash? Not me, that’s for freaking sure. And to make matters worse, I got it on my FACE. And it was sooooo iiiiitchyyy. Oh it was awful. I couldn’t wear makeup because it would just make it worse. I couldn’t put anything on it that might irritate it. I tried numerous products, generic and name brand, and finally generic cortisone 10 worked for me. It lasted for about a week and a half, give or take a few days, and was super annoying!

3. Not all women get cravings. I’ve hardly craved anything. I’ve taken a liking to fruit so that basically all I ate for every meal of the day was fruit for like, three weeks or so, but haven’t craved much! I would always get random cravings before being pregnant – like, mouth is watering, stomach is rumbling, nearly breaking out in a sweat, kind of cravings – so I figured I’d get the worst of it! The only one I can really remember that was super bad was when I was driving home and had to take a detour to the Dollar General because I was craving Airheads Xtremes, and the generic ones at the DG were 8 for $1. I ate 3 or 4 on my five minute drive home. I was also really crazy about anything pumpkin there for a while. Pumpkin bread, pumpkin pancakes (which I could still eat every day), pumpkin cookies, just anything. Oh, and I could probably eat a dozen Texas Roadhouse rolls for a meal every day. Every. Day. Other than that, no really terrible cravings.

4. On the subject of food, some of my favorite foods I have aversions to. B and I carved pumpkins the night before Halloween and I was so so so so excited about roasting the seeds! I couldn’t wait for them to dry out overnight – like every year – so I took the hair dryer to them for 10 minutes and stuck them in the oven salted and buttered. Oh my gosh I was so excited. They smelled so good and they looked delicious, and they’re one of my favorite things that define fall. Well, after a few handfuls, I felt absolutely awful. SO NAUSEOUS. I haven’t even had any morning sickness, and have only been sick to my stomach one time from riding in the car! Where did this nausea come from! It was so miserable. The one food I had really been dying to eat for a long time I had developed an aversion for. ): This has also happened with a couple of other foods I can’t recall right now.

5. Vagina lightning. Yes, it’s a real thing. No, I am not kidding whatsoever. It comes out of nowhere with no mercy!!!

6. Not all moms “just know” the gender. I felt really weird about not getting any gender vibes before we found out. I can’t count how many people asked me, “Do you have any feelings about what it is yet?” and it was so disheartening. I thought I was some loner who had no intuition. Thanks to Baby Center and fellow expecting moms, I found out that’s normal too. So if you get any weird looks when you tell people you just don’t know (like I did) tell the jerk to shut up and take their snarky face elsewhere.

7. You might start mixing things up. Words, thoughts, dates, anything and everything! I’ve always been very conscious about my grammar and how I word things, and even been super good at tongue twisters, but for the past couple of months I guess my brain just doesn’t care anymore. I don’t know how many times I’ve been talking to Brian and he’ll laugh and say, “You said ___, instead of ___!” and it just irks me to no end! My mom is a teacher so I grew up really paying attention to what I say and how I say it. Darn pregnancy brain!

8. You might start lactating earlier than you expect – possibly even around 17 or 18 weeks. This one really surprised me. There I was, minding my own business, when all the sudden it’s like the Amazon river has a direct gateway to my nipples. Literally, it was FLOWING. For a few days, any time I bent over, it would just flow. I’d wake up with the bed sheets and my shirt soaked. My bras were stained. It was so annoying! So I kept wishing it would stop, and it did… and then I was absolutely miserable. It was just they just got jammed and refused to leak, and it hurt sooooo badly! Now it’s back to it’s regular super soaker flow and I’m in much less pain.

9. Just because you’re pregnant, it doesn’t mean people will be less rude in public. I’m noticeably pregnant now, with a nice round belly, and people still don’t pay attention to where they walk, who they bump into, or when the door is slamming right in my face. So don’t think just ’cause you’re pregnant you’re gonna get public perks – I sure haven’t, yet! ;(

10. Not all new moms only feel their baby after so many weeks or months. I heard that during your first pregnancy, you probably won’t realize what it feels like when the baby moves until around 22 weeks/6 months. Such a lie! I felt tiny little flutters around 12 weeks, and then nothing for a long time. Then a few bumps here and there around week 17, and then during week 18 it was like a gymnastic Olympian had taken over my uterus! I’m now 21 weeks and completely aware of her schedule and can see her pushing up my belly. It’s so weird and so mesmerizing. I am so in love with her and her crazy antics!

Counting my blessings…

…would take way too long!

Facebook is flooded every day with a new thing people are thankful for in spirit of Thanksgiving. I have to admit, I love reading all of them, even if some of them are pretty dumb and superficial. It just warms my heart to know that there is actually a little bit of depth to some of the people I thought were soulless.

Uhhh, any ways! πŸ˜‰

Here is my list of things I’m thankful for! I’ll be adding a new one every day, of course!

  1. I’m thankful for my family. Duhhh! Even the crazies, the troublemakers, the ones who are a little lost. All of them. I love my family. We’re all we have when it really comes down to it. (:
  2. I’m thankful for all of the opportunities I’ve been given to further my photography business. If my mom hadn’t bought me my (at the time) dream camera, I would have never been able to really dig in and do the things I really wanted to do, and lately I’ve had tons of business, all of it positive, and I’m loving all of my new clients! I feel like I learn something new during every single photoshoot.
  3. I’m thankful for Brian. He’s different from anyone I’ve ever been in a relationship with. I always told myself I didn’t want to date a country boy because they’re so closed minded, they’re rednecks, they won’t understand the things I’m into, and from what I can tell, the ones around here are just judgmental about any girl who doesn’t act like she’s from up the holler! But you know what.. Brian proved me wrong. His sweet country accent, stupid working boots, love for horses and knowledge of farming really got me. I dunno what it was. He’s definitely not closed minded or judgmental. I think he’s one of a kind, and definitely something special. πŸ™‚ He’s the love of my life and every time we cuddle up together in bed I still get the most comforting feeling. I’m so grateful for him. β™₯
  4. I’m thankful to be able to wake up every day knowing that if anything were to go terribly wrong, no matter what it would be, I have the best support system. I have people who love me everywhere, always willing to show me and I so appreciate that. β™₯
  5. I’m thankful for my baby girl. She was totally unexpected and we did plan for her.. just 5+ years down the road, but she’s here and we’re taking responsibility for her, and we are more and more excited every day. It was just in God’s plans for us to have her right now. Every time she moves, pokes up on my belly, uses my uterus as a trampoline, and does barrel rolls.. my heart just fills even more with love. I can’t wait to meet her. πŸ™‚
  6. I’m thankful that I was raised with such love and understanding of God. While my grandparents might be a bit more hardcore than I when it comes to religion, I’m very spiritual and very connected to God and pray numerous times throughout the day and always before I go to bed at night. I have so much to thank him for (obviously!) and when I am not strong enough, I can give in and lean on him and it brings me so much relief. I always know that God has a plan for me and to be able to trust in him and something so much bigger than myself and anything on this planet is just so wonderful.
  7. I’m thankful to be where I am emotionally and mentally. I used to have such horrible anxiety, bad depression and a bad self-esteem and self-image. I’ve learned that, even though I hate to rely on medicine to make me better, it is NOT a nuisance, it helps more than I realize.

Before Baby To-Do

There are lots of things I’d like to get done before the baby gets here. I know we have around 6 months before baby’s due date, but anyone who has ever met me knows I’m am one hell of a procrastinator.

I love to make to-do lists (and lists of any kind, for that matter), but rarely finish everything on them. I think my problem is once I get motivated and the gears in my mind start grinding, i get overly-ambitious and only have a spurt of motivation that will not be continuous if my procrastinating genes have anything to do with it.

SO. I’m going to make a list of things that need to ACTUALLY GET DONE before baby gets here. This is more of a cosmetic thing I believe, not all the practical things. I’ll have plenty of time (and suddenly no time at all before I know it) to fret over what to wear/take to the hospital, a for-sure name, all those things. No.. this is my craft/organizing list.

And seriously, these things really needs to get done. No bull-hockey (as my Papaw would say). If I’m going to be useful for anything besides an incubator for these next two trimesters, it’s gonna be a not-so-lean, more-moody-than-mean crafting and organizing machine.

So what do I need/want to do?

  1. Complete room makeover. This needs to be done because this room isn’t only my room. I’m sharing it with Brian now. That Hello Kitty calendar? Love ya, but see ya. That floral jewelery organizer? Adios. All things that scream “I just figured out I’m going to be a mom and I don’t really want to let go of being a young woman who will barely be drinking age by the time my baby is born” need to be put away, sold, donated, re-purposed, just gone. I think the only things about OUR room that don’t need to be changed are the grey walls, the bed, and the dresser/chest set. Maybe a bookshelf can stay. ):
  2. DIY baby decor. I have so many ideas! We haven’t completely decided on a theme yet, since we don’t know the gender, but for either one I have lots of cute, endearing ideas that would be so classy, adorable and not super cliche. These include yarn wrapped wooden/cardboard letters, framed fabric, framed ultrasound photos (temporary decor of course, but completely unavoidable), canvas light, and many others. A few of them can be viewed here on my baby board over at Pinterest!
  3. Clean/re-do corner desk. It’s an awful, ugly, cheap desk that surprisingly survived the house fire we had a few years ago. I didn’t want to let go of it because it was one thing that didn’t burn. It’s become my crafting table so it’s gotten a little roughed up. I’d like to sand it down, paint a nice, simple yet eye-catching pattern on it, and give it a new life. Also, the stupid little tiny shelves on the outside and the big ones on the inside, those are definitely coming out and getting covered with some pretty type of paper and modpodged.
  4. A new organization system for my crafts. I have lots of crafting supplies. No seriously – LOTS. If a stranger took a peek into my storage drawers and nothing else, they’d think a little old lady with lots of time and nothing else owned everything in it. The problem is that everything is stored in ugly, cheap, childish plastic storage drawers. You know, those stacked shelves that you buy for your dorm room? Yeah those. I’m definitely going to flea markets and Goodwill and I’m going to find a cheap bookshelf or old dresser/chest to rip apart and re-do. I want that nice, clean, organized look with those fabric storage bins that just simply sit inside the shelves, ready to be pulled out with ease.
  5. Nursery. Uhhh this needs no explaining. I’m really really really going to try not to put all this off for the nursery.. but there are a couple of things standing in the way. The baby’s room used to be (kinda still is) the storage room. We’ve weeded out a LOT of stuff, but there are still some of my boxes, totes, and crafting shelves, as well as some of my mom’s things for her classroom (one of those teachers who get all hardcore and work when not at work – so many teaching supplies). We don’t have anywhere in the house to put them, so we plan on putting them in the garage. The bad part about that, we just turned our garage into a garage from a dirty old building for hay, tools, firewood, etc. Welcome to Kentucky/living in a field where we grow and sell hay which needs somewhere to be stored. So until we can get it all cleaned out and organized and not so gross, I am NOT putting my good things out there! So there are a couple of things prolonging us from starting on the nursery – BESIDES not knowing the baby’s gender.

I’m pretty sure that’s the most important.. surely I couldn’t forget anything important enough to make this to-do list! Wish me luck.. I NEED it!

10 Things People Forgot To Mention About PREGNANCY

Being a new, unexpected mom, I didn’t know a lot about pregnancy other than that it was sometimes a wonderful experience, totally easy and made your skin glow, and other times morning sickness occurred the whole time, your broke out, and you looked like shit, and sometimes in between.

When we found out I was pregnant, I got lots of tips and advice. Mainly how tired I will be, how I need to watch what I eat and make sure I eat enough protein/fiber, how I’ll probably get constipated, crackers are good for morning sickness and a flat soda, etc. All the basics. No one really got into the nitty gritty, until I mentioned it and they were all, “Ooohhh yeahhh, that’s normal too,” acting like a forewarning wasn’t a nice thing to give me.

So, here is a list for all the other new, unexpected moms out there who may (and hopefully will) come across this. I kind of like learning things first hand, because I love telling my experiences and being able to help others, but still… a forewarning would have been nice.

10 Things People Forgot To Mention About PREGNANCY

1. Horrible, stinky, sewer-smelling, cramping, constant FARTS. All day. Every day. At awkward, quiet moments. In elevators. When you finally get comfy and cuddled right up against your significant other and have to move because you don’t want to fart on them. Around your in-laws. Around friends who aren’t super close friends so it would be a little weird to just admit to it and try to laugh it off, even though they know you did it because, well, they know they didn’t do it. ANYWHERE. YOU CANNOT ESCAPE IT. Until around 11 or 12 weeks, possibly. That’s when it stopped for me – now it’s just occasional.

2. Lost of vaginal discharge. All the time. I feel so gross. I’ve started keeping baby wipes at the toilet and I’m carrying some in my purse for when we go out.

3. I’m not more tired than usual or fatigued – I’m practicing hibernation. The bears are gonna be soooo jealous when they hear what I’m up to. 1 nap a day? Pshhh, sometimes I take 2. Lawd help everyone if I don’t get my nap.

4. Baby isn’t here yet, but I still can’t sleep well. For a while, no matter WHAT time I went to sleep, be it 12am or 5am, I would wake up around 9:30am every single morning. Also, no matter how tired I was, I would roll around in bed, toss and turn, yawning, begging for sleep… and then 3 hours later, I’d finally just pass out. Real, just plain old good sleep, is a rarity already. I know it won’t compare to when the baby is here… but c’mon body, at least give me a little bit of a break!

5. “Don’t be afraid to ask silly questions!” Such a lie. Definitely be weary. Just Google it or if you’re patient enough, save it for your OB/GYN who probably deals with people way more stupid than you every day. Apparently when you ask the average person a question about pregnancy, you appear naive, immature, and overly excited about being pregnant. Like I said – Just Google it.

6. “You’ll probably be a little constipated.” Also a lie. Gonna be super honest here: not taking a poo for NINE DAYS is not a little constipated. It’s not even really constipated. It’s the next level above extremely constipated.

7. Bless you! You’re probably sneezing your head off, right? That’s all I know how to do. And I am either going to bed or waking up with a stuffy nose. Apparently, pregnancy makes your sinuses swell.

8. Sex drive? What is that? I don’t know if I have ever heard of that…

9. Those annoying little pains you get when you cough, laugh, or strain are normal nuisances you’ll have to deal with after your 2nd trimester. They’re called round ligament pain. It happens because the muscles around your uterus are stretching to prepare for your growing baby.

10. Some days, I eat EVERYTHING. Pizza? Heck yeah! Pre-preg I didn’t like pizza, maybe once a year or so. Same thing with McDonald’s cheeseburgers. Pregnant Autumn wants pizza and Mickey D.’s cheeseburgers all the time. Along with everything else in the cabinets and lazy suzan. Peanut butter? Break that stuff out! Just eat it with a spoon. Oh, those pickles look awesome. Strawberries, mmmm. Barbecue chips ohmygod. And then other days, I’ll take two bites of something and not want to eat for the rest of the day because I feel so full.

There you have it. My (probably first of a few) list of things people forgot to mention about pregnancy. Hopefully some new mom-to-be out there like me sees this before it’s too late! πŸ˜‰